A Cup of Cold Water

"And whoever gives one of these little ones even a cup of cold water because he is [my] disciple, truly, I say to you, he will by no means lose his reward." ~ Matthew 10:42

I heard this Scripture quoted recently and it really got my attention. A cup of cold water is a pretty small thing for most of us. We don't have to go to draw from a well as Rachel and the Samaritan woman did. We would simply have to open the refrigerator and pour a cup from a nicely chilled pitcher, or hand someone a bottle of water  - with minimal effort in all but special cases.

When I think about the simplicity of genuine service that He accepts, I know I've passed up way too many opportunities to do good. In fact, I can clearly recall a sense of irritation at times when asked to do simple tasks, or to stop what I'm engaged in to help someone else out.

The Lord will remember the smallest, seemingly insignificant things we do, out of honor and love for fellow believers. Not only will He remember, but He will also reward us for doing them. God watches us and records our doings. Every. Little. Thing.

I hope you will join me in making a commitment to be more conscientious about these little things, so that we can please Him more fully. Let's find ways, and grasp opportunities, to convert our strength, resources, and time into heavenly treasures.

Resolve to Love

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Resolve to Love 
By Kerry and Chris Shook

Right now, there are three relationships in your life that trouble you. Perhaps a good friend said something to you yesterday. It felt critical, but you’re not sure what she meant. The two of you used to be so close, but lately you’ve been drifting apart. Something’s not right. Oh, and your mother called. There’s that. You know you should return her call, but you haven’t. Why? You know there are things you should have said before, you avoided them, and now you feel it’s too late. It’s always so hard with her. Always messy. And then...your son has been missing. Not missing physically, but he’s been distant, quiet, silent. Missing emotionally. What’s that about? What’s going on in his life? You want to reach out, but he pushes you away. It worries you.

Maybe the relationships in your life aren’t exactly like these, but I’m guessing these remind you of someone close to you, a problem relationship in your life right now. Maybe it’s not your mother but your father, perhaps not your son but a daughter-in-law. It could be your best friend. Whoever it is, he or she is someone who matters to you—or else the relationship wouldn’t trouble you, gnaw at you on the inside, make you question and grumble, or even bring you to tears.

So take a moment and think, who are these three key people in your life? Which meaningful relationships are troubling you? Relationships you wish were closer. Relationships you’d like to be deeper and richer. Relationships that trouble you, bother you, even make you a little crazy right now.

Seriously, think about it. Who are they? And now take a moment to name these three key relationships out loud.

Trust me, this is important for you. In fact, this may be the most significant thing you do in your life right now. Why?

Because life is way too short. At the end of the day—at the end of The Day—in this all-too-short life we share, all that really matters is relationships. Our relationships with the God who created us and with the people we love. Compared to these relationships, the job or career goals we set now aren’t really so important, the ladders we try to climb don’t matter so much, and the objects we long to own and possess seem utterly trivial.

What really counts in the end is that special knowing look you share with your spouse, the arms of your child reaching up to you, or the quiet comfort of a friend who stands by your side in a difficult time.

The award-winning animated movie Up contains some profound truths about relationships. In a breathtaking sequence early in the film, we see the entire arc of the life of Carl, a balloon salesman, as he meets Ellie, falls in love, and gets married. They share a dream to travel to South America and save every penny for their big trip. But there’s something familiar about the way their savings are constantly being used for the urgencies and emergencies of daily life. Before Carl and Ellie know it, they’re in their seventies, and although they have a beautiful marriage, they never realized their dream adventure.

Ellie dies, and Carl is overwhelmed with regret about the trip they never took. In a desperate attempt to escape loneliness and recapture memories of Ellie, Carl attaches a bunch of balloons to his house and sets out for South America! You begin to realize as the movie progresses that this dream trip they were saving for, this object of their future plan together, wasn’t really that important after all. The real adventure was the life they shared along the way.

The same is true for us: the adventure of a lifetime is right in front of us. It’s just cleverly disguised as a familiar face.

Think about the possible loss of the relationship with one of those three people you named. You can’t do anything about death and the physical departure of one of them from this earth. That’s in God’s hands.

But you can do something about your relationship with them in life.

Much of what you’ve been told about relationships is upside down and wrong.

Researchers tell us that a baby sees everything upside down for the first few days of life until the brain can adjust the visual picture to right side up. Most relationships today are stuck in this same infant stage; we tend to see relationships upside down, and our culture only reinforces this view. The concept of love at first sight permeates our music, movies, television, and books. What we learn as children and continue to believe as adults is that a fairy-tale relationship somehow just happens. Now, I’m not bashing romance, but meaningful relationships depend on seeing other people as they are and looking at them right side up. Real love—whether romantic love, a close friendship, or a family relationship—happens long after first sight. It shows up as people get to know each other more deeply and often after they work through tough things together. Real love in relationships isn’t a magic act; it’s a journey. When people say, “It was love at first sight,” what they really mean is “I was attracted to that person the first time I saw them.” There is nothing wrong with being infatuated with someone at the start of a relationship. The real question, however, is, do you have a love that is growing stronger and deeper every day?

I don’t believe in love at first sight; I believe in love at last sight. Each of my relationships has the potential to be better the next time we’re together than it was the previous time so that the last time we see each other on this earth we’re closer than ever before.

Adapted from One Month to Love by Kerry and Chris Shook with permission of Multnomah Books, a division of Random House, Inc. All rights reserved.

Pour On the Oil and the Wine

In Luke 10:30-36 Jesus tells the story of a man who showed practical love and kindness to a stranger.

“A man was going down from Jerusalem to Jericho, and he fell among robbers, who stripped him and beat him and departed, leaving him half dead. Now by chance a priest was going down that road, and when he saw him he passed by on the other side. So likewise a Levite, when he came to the place and saw him, passed by on the other side. But a Samaritan, as he journeyed, came to where he was, and when he saw him, he had compassion. He went to him and bound up his wounds, pouring on oil and wine. Then he set him on his own animal and brought him to an inn and took care of him. And the next day he took out two denarii and gave them to the innkeeper, saying, ‘Take care of him, and whatever more you spend, I will repay you when I come back.’"

Just like this man that we now know as the Good Samaritan, you and I are to going to come upon wounded people along our path. Their wounds are not bloody and gaping on the outside. Instead, their hearts are broken. They have forgotten how to smile, for real, from the inside. They are insecure, lonely, and they wish they could trust again. They carry unseen loads of guilt, shame, self-loathing. They never feel comfortable in their own skin. They feel different although they don't quite know what 'normal' is. Broken hearts, oppressed spirits, mangled emotions, and tormented thoughts. Lying along the path you just happen to be traveling.

If you've met Christ, then you've met the Healer. You've been touched by the One who makes all things new, a perfect Redeemer. You are sealed with His Spirit. Spirit-filled believer you are a reservoir of living water which these people need to be saved, healed, revived. The Spirit of God is often prefigured in the Old Testament Scriptures as holy anointing oil, and compared in the New Testament Scriptures to heart-gladdening new wine. Draw out and pour on the oil and wine to the hurting and broken. Your tongue is the ladle, and the spout. Speak kind words. Speak healing words. Proclaim truth. Share the gospel of Jesus Christ. Pray and intercede with faith. You are meant to be more than an occasional Good Samaritan. You are always on duty, an ambassador of Jesus Christ and a minister of reconciliation (2 Cor 5:18-20). You are drawing on a never-ending supply, so go on, pour on the oil and the wine.

Bubble Forth!

Psalm 145 is all about the splendor, greatness, power, and majesty of God. It shows how that knowledge turns into the only reasonable response of praise to God. I love this Psalm. The last time I read it recently, I read it three times back to back, just trying to soak it in better, and more and more. One little verse especially thrills me when I think of the part I get to play in making His greatness known:

Men shall speak of the might of Your awesome acts,
And I will declare Your greatness.
They shall utter the memory of Your great goodness,
And shall sing of Your righteousness.
Psalm 145:7-8

In verse 8 above, the phrase translated 'utter' (some translations include 'abundantly utter' or 'eagerly utter') literally means to "bubble forth" the memory of God's great goodness. I just love that. I see that. It fits perfectly.

It's the picture of an excited kid coming home from school and practically gushing all the exciting tale of the day's events to a parent. It's a girl talking to her best friend on the phone after a particularly thrilling experience and leaving none of the details out. It's an intimate and detailed heart to heart with your special someone when things are finally falling into place and plans you've made are shaping up.

Walking with God through the thick and thin, we have opportunity after opportunity to experience His greatness and His power to deliver, to heal, to save, to comfort, to guide, to provide and more. We are to keep the memories of these events fresh in our mind and be ready to bubble forth all that He has done. It brings glory to God, it refreshes your intimacy with Him, and it adds grace to the hearer!

Bubble forth!

Psalm 145

1 I will extol You, my God, O King;

And I will bless Your name forever and ever.

2 Every day I will bless You,

And I will praise Your name forever and ever.

3 Great is the LORD, and greatly to be praised;

And His greatness is unsearchable.

4 One generation shall praise Your works to another,

And shall declare Your mighty acts.

5 I will meditate on the glorious splendor of Your majesty,

And on Your wondrous works.

6 Men shall speak of the might of Your awesome acts,

And I will declare Your greatness.

7 They shall utter the memory of Your great goodness,

And shall sing of Your righteousness.

8 The LORD is gracious and full of compassion,

Slow to anger and great in mercy.

9 The LORD is good to all,

And His tender mercies are over all His works.

10 All Your works shall praise You, O LORD,

And Your saints shall bless You.

11 They shall speak of the glory of Your kingdom,

And talk of Your power,

12 To make known to the sons of men His mighty acts,

And the glorious majesty of His kingdom.

13 Your kingdom is an everlasting kingdom,

And Your dominion endures throughout all generations.

14 The LORD upholds all who fall,

And raises up all who are bowed down.

15 The eyes of all look expectantly to You,

And You give them their food in due season.

16 You open Your hand

And satisfy the desire of every living thing.

17 The LORD is righteous in all His ways,

Gracious in all His works.

18 The LORD is near to all who call upon Him,

To all who call upon Him in truth.

19 He will fulfill the desire of those who fear Him;

He also will hear their cry and save them.

20 The LORD preserves all who love Him,

But all the wicked He will destroy.

21 My mouth shall speak the praise of the LORD,

And all flesh shall bless His holy name

Forever and ever.

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House Rules

Having purified your souls by your obedience to the truth for a sincere brotherly love, love one another earnestly from a pure heart.
1 Peter 1:22

Below are a few of the "one-another" commands in the Bible that are the 'rules' for our conduct as members of the household of God (Ephesians 2:19).
[From the webpage, place your cursor over the Scripture references to read the Scripture verses. It's important!]

* Accept one another - Romans 15:7

* Be hospitable to one another - 1 Peter 4:9

* Be of the same mind with one another - Romans 15:5-6

* Be patient with one another - Ephesians 4:2

* Build up one another - Romans 14:19

* Be devoted to one another - Romans 12:10a

* Be kind and forgiving of one another - Ephesians 4:32

* Be honest with one another - Colossians 3:9

* Care for one another - 1 Corinthians 12:25

* Carry one another's burdens - Galatians 6:2

* Comfort one another - 1 Thessalonians 4:18

* Confess your sins to one another - James 5:16

* Embrace one another - Romans 16:16

* Encourage one another - 1 Thessalonians 5:11

* Fellowship with one another - 1 John 1:7

* Honor one another - Romans 12:10b

* Live in harmony with one another - Romans 12:16

* Love one another - Romans 13:8

* Pray for one another - James 5:16

* Serve one another - Galatians 5:13

* Show mercy and compassion to one another - Zechariah 7:9

* Spur one another on to love and good works - Hebrews 10:24

* Submit to one another - Ephesians 5:21

* Teach and admonish one another - Colossians 3:16

* Worship with one another - Ephesians 5:19  Facebook
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I Know It Hurts. Love Anyway.

After you've been hurt, betrayed, used, rejected, abandoned, or deceived in a relationship (whether by family members, friends, or significant others), it's common to want to protect yourself by withdrawing. You think it will protect you from future pain. However, if you choose that route you will lose more than the equivalent of whatever future pain there may be. You'll become a shell of a person, either avoiding or rejecting others; or hurting and using others cold-heartedly. As someone who has been there, I encourage you to keep investing in love, God's way. Because, you see, there is a beautiful paradox where true godly love is concerned. That same love that is implanted in the hearts of believers by the Holy Spirit, and which is nurtured by sacrificial obedience to God's word, will make you vulnerable to heartache, but it is also a healing balm.

A commitment to godly love protects your heart from the defilement of bitterness or destructive tendencies. Such defilement usually accompanies heartache when the relationship that was broken was built only upon a worldly passion, or an unreasonable and self-centered devotion. True, godly, love even when met with heartache will draw out Christlikeness in your own character - a fragrance of mercy, forgiveness, and faithfulness. And it preserves tenderness and compassion in your heart to invest in other, or future, relationships.

Your heart will be wounded in this world. Christ's heart was wounded because He loved. He came to His own who did not receive Him. He was mocked, scorned and struck by those He was suffering for; despised and rejected by those He loved; betrayed by a friend; denied by a close companion (see John 1:10-11; Isaiah 53:1-12; Ephesians 2:4-7). But Jesus loved anyway. Even upon the cross, in the excruciating pain of the last moments of His earthly life, He made intercession for those who crucified Him. No, not all who He loves did, or will, love Him in return, but there are those who do. They love Him because He first loved them (1 John 4:19), and they have sealed and proved their love with their own blood, or have suffered the loss of all worldly things for His sake. His love paved the way for others to be able to love Him, and one another, with this other-worldly, overcoming love.

In the same way, despite the wounding you've suffered, if you keep looking to God to be your Source and Chief Joy, and stay committed to loving with His love, He will place others who are also being transformed by His love into your life. The richness you will experience from these new relationships will be amplified because of the depth of character you gained in your willingness to love, show mercy, compassion, and forgive even when others hurt you. Remember "love suffers long", and "love never ends". "And now faith, hope, love, these three remain; but the greatest of these is love" (see 1 Corinthians 13). I know it hurts now, but love will also be your healing balm. Love will reap eternal relationships, and rewards. Love anyway.

I have found the paradox, that if you love until it hurts, there can be no more hurt, only more love. - Mother Teresa

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10 Little Christians

10 little Christians standing in line. 1 disliked the preacher, then there were 9.

9 little Christians stayed up very late. 1 overslept Sunday, then there were 8.

8 little Christians on their way to Heaven. 1 took the low road and then there were 7.

7 little Christians chirping like chicks. 1 disliked music, then there were 6.

6 little Christians seemed very much alive, but one lost his interest then there was 5.

5 little Christians pulling for Heaven's Shore, but one stopped to rest, then there were 4.

4 little Christians each busy as a bee. 1 got his feelings hurt, then there were 3.

3 little Christians knew not what to do. 1 joined the sporty crowd, then there were 2.

2 little Christians, our rhyme is nearly done, differed with each other, then there was 1.

1 little Christian can't do much 'tis true, brought his friend to bible study, then there were 2.

2 earnest Christians, each won one more. That doubled the number, then there were 4.

4 sincere Christians worked early and late. Each won another then there were 8.

8 splendid Christians if they doubled as before. In just so many Sundays, we'd have 1,024.

In this little jingle, there is a lesson true, you belong either to the building or to the wrecking crew!

Author Unknown  Facebook
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How Far is Too Far: Sexual Integrity for Singles

In my last post just a few days ago I shared a short article I'd found called Eight Great Traits of Future Mates by Lee Warren and Julie Ferwerda. It was full of incredibly wise guidelines for recognizing a person with the qualities to be a truly godly mate. The article would have been helpful to everyone in some way, but it was most relevant to singles. Today I would like to share another article which I believe is a 'must-read' for any single and those already in a dating relationship. This article was published by Every Man's Battle [a great site ministering to single and married men] but every unmarried man AND woman needs to read this article, especially if there are questions, concerns, or conflicts about managing affection and desire in a pre-marital relationship. Because there are points in this short article which will shed more light on certain principles shared in the one I posted previously, they are helpful to consider together. I especially encourage you to read this article slowly, prayerfully, and to go to the Scripture to read the verses referenced by the author.


Via EMB by Bob Parkins on May 6 2011.

Not many Christians debate God’s instructions against premarital sex. However, there is still not a consensus or a shared understanding regarding what constitutes acceptable physical affection and what is sinful. The Bible uses words like adultery, fornication, lust, and purity, all words that have very clear meanings. Yet many Christian singles, teens, and even parents remain confused. Many Christian singles and teens struggle to maintain sexual purity while abstaining from sexual intercourse, yet many are engaging in sexual acts. They deceive themselves by legalistically reasoning they haven’t violated God’s boundaries because they haven’t technically had sex.

While the Bible does not appear to clarify exactly what other acts for singles are and are not acceptable in God’s eyes, it is very clear about the guidelines we are meant to judge these acts by. When asked by young couples, “how far is too far?” I generally ask them to search their hearts and examine what their intention and motivation in asking is. Usually a couple who asks “how far,” is also struggling to maintain sexual purity. Those struggling with sexual purity or addictions are in the habit of pushing limits and boundaries. They want to know what is the maximum they can get away with. They look for loopholes in attempts to satisfy the desire for immediate self gratification.

The Bible warns us about being deceived and worshiping idols (Deut 11:16; Exo 20:14), and sex can be an idol to those who struggle to maintain purity. Scripture also tells us that God sees what truly is in our hearts and we will sow what we reap (Gal 6:7). If you have ever asked “how far,” and have patterns of pushing limits, it is likely you are not truly interested in purity and really want to get away with as much physical affection as possible. When you put it that way it seems silly to consider the technicality of sin. If you discover your motive is to selfishly seek your own physical gratification, instead refocus on what is pure (Php 4:8).

When you flirt with sin, you put yourself in a position to sin. To answer the question more directly, anything that causes you to sin is “too far.” This is probably the best litmus test for determining limits since the Bible doesn’t tell couples specifically how they can show physical affection, at least not in the manner many look for. There are several scriptural examples of expressing affection through treasuring chastity and virtue and abstaining from sexual immorality (Isa 62:5; 2 Cor 11:2), a counter-cultural perspective in most increasingly permissive/promiscuous societies. Jesus models surrendering personal desires to the Father (Luk 22:42), and encourages us to ask for God’s intervention in maintaining victory over sin in The Lord’s Prayer (Luk 11:4). If you are willfully sustaining a desire that cannot be righteously met, you are deceiving yourself (1Thess 4:3-8).

Determining limits may be a little different for different couples, but be cautioned against any propensity to justify pushing limits. If you get excited to the point that you struggle with lustful thoughts or fantasies from kissing, or if you have difficulty respecting boundaries (yours or hers), you may not be able to handle more. Consider then abstaining from kissing or other applicable acts. Some may not struggle with kissing and will need to set limits accordingly. I suggest also abstaining from any physical activity or show of affection that you are not comfortable doing in front of her father. There are several genuine and appropriate displays of affection that pass this test.

It is important that couples talk about setting physical limits early in their relationship. We live in a backwards culture where single men often push women to/beyond their sexual limit. This is not what God intends or requires of us in marriage, so it certainly cannot be condoned in dating. Men are to cherish and protect their wives, not take advantage of them for their own pleasure (Eph 5:25-28; Col 3:19). Just as a father is to protect the innocence of his daughter, so are we to protect and respect any woman we are dating. Sexual desire for her is not bad, but respecting her virtue means protecting her from these desires (yours or hers).

Men, it is up to you to initiate this conversation and establish boundaries. This may be the very first act you exhibit of spiritual leadership in a budding relationship. Any potential spouse who is worth spending your life with will respect your integrity because they will feel safe and cherished. Two scripture verses that are helpful in maintaining focus on purity are:

- (2Ti 2:22) Flee also youthful lusts: but follow righteousness, faith, charity, peace, with them that call on the Lord out of a pure heart.

- (Php 4:8) Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things. Be encouraged by the peace God promises those that live pure and virtuous lives.  Facebook
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Eight Great Traits of Future Mates

I was going through some older archived email recently and found a great short article on recognizing traits that make for a godly future mate. I thought this article was so good that rather than only deleting it as an old email, I needed to share it where it could benefit others for a long time. This article is obviously most pertinent to singles, but I also think that married followers of Jesus Christ can assess their own growth in relationship by measuring against the guidelines given.

Via Single Purpose by Lee Warren and Julie Ferwerda on 3/4/09

Determining if the guy or gal you’ve been dating is the kind of person you want to marry can be confusing. Maybe you wonder at what point you’re either being too picky or too accommodating. Maybe you have trouble recognizing the habits and traits that should be present in a God-honoring mate. Consider the following questions to help determine the spiritual vitality of any potential mates.

Growing. Does this person seek out God willingly and eagerly on their own (without relying on you) by reading the Bible, praying, engaging in ministry at some level, and fellowshipping with other believers? God's best will have a growing relationship with Him that is genuine, fresh, and intimate in a way that is noticeably and consistently affecting their life.

Praying. Does this person pray regularly? Do they easily pray with you or in front of others? Do they talk about their prayer concerns and answered prayers? A marriage without prayer is like a light that hasn't been switched on — dark and powerless. A great mate will be someone who is conversing with God on a regular basis for direction in life, developing prayerful intimacy with God, and investing in the lives of others.

Pure. No matter what mistakes have been made in the past, is this person determined – now – to wait until marriage to have sex, refusing to use your body for their own sinful pleasure? Do they honor their word to preserve purity, not trying to entice you into a physical relationship? Does this person work hard to avoid “pushing the limits?" A great barometer of a person's current spiritual life is how they control their sexual urges. If they truly love God (and you) and want to be obediently set apart for Him, there won't be any excuses, playing with fire, or compromises. Trust me, this is possible. It’s called delayed gratification.

Teachable. Does this person ask for help? Do they admit when they’re wrong and say they're sorry? Do they respect God-given authority? Do they seek out godly counsel? Someone who invites wise counsel into their lives is a very trustworthy person. Plus, if a person is teachable with others, they will likely be teachable with God. There’s no greater trust and security in marriage than a mate who’s teachable before God, seeking His will above his/her own.

Honest. Does this person tell you the truth even when it's hard? Do they communicate openly about their feelings, struggles, past, and failures? Do they take responsibility for their actions when they do something wrong or hurtful? Do they frequently twist the truth or minimize to get out of trouble or make themselves look better? Counting on your partner's word in marriage is vital so there should be all the signs of honesty and openness, even when discussing hard issues or admitting to wrongs.

Whole. Does this person place their hopes, expectations, and emotional needs in God alone or do they try to fill up emptiness with the emotional support of others (you), or overindulgence in things like alcohol, food, drugs including prescriptions, spending money, T.V., sports, etc.? Does this relationship feel more like a drain or does it create positive energy? In a healthy marriage, both individuals must know where to get “filled up,” not depending on the other for happiness or constant fulfillment. They do not avoid pain or boredom, and are not afraid to be quiet and still. They must each be secure in their relationship with God alone. Only then can you have a content joy in being together without dashed expectations and hopes.

Surrendered. Is this person independently pursuing their own plans and goals, or do they frequently offer up their lives to God and His plans? If the person you marry is living for their own plans, you are not going to have the marriage God intends for you. Two people who are surrendered to God’s plans open up doors for a great marriage adventure!

Forgiving. Does this person forgive and get over things easily? Does he/she treat people kindly who have hurt them? Is there any area of bitterness or unforgiveness from their past that shows on the surface? A person who can't forgive usually hasn't really connected with God's forgiveness toward them. This person’s bitterness will make your life bitter, too. People who are forgiving recognize that God is ultimately in control and they can let go of offenses. This will work in your favor when you have marital conflict!

The most important thing to remember is that, whatever traits or habits you’re looking for in a future mate, you must also exemplify them yourself. If you want a godly mate, you will only attract that kind of person if you are that sort of person.  Facebook
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A Harsh Word, Harshly Said

This little poem really resonates with me lately. I have been on the receiving end of harsh words from people that I held dear. I also know I have been unwise and hurtful in my own words at different times with various others. There really is no "undo" button for the words we speak and I think this little poem packs a punch rooted in Biblical wisdom. We would all do well to take it to heart.

One day a harsh word, harshly said,

Upon an evil journey sped.

And like a sharp and cruel dart,

It pierced a fond and loving heart.

It turned a friend into a foe,

And everywhere brought pain and woe.

A kind word followed it one day,

Sped swiftly on its blessed way.

It healed the wound and soothed the pain,

And friends of old were friends again.

It made the hate and anger cease,

And everywhere brought joy and peace.

And yet the harsh word left a trace,

The kind word could not efface.

And though the heart its love regained,

It left a scar that long remained.

Friends can forgive but not forget,

Nor lose the sense of keen regret.

Oh, if we would but learn to know,

How swift and sure our words can go.

How we would weigh with utmost care,

Each thought before it reached the air.

And only speak the words that move,

Like white-winged messengers of love.

Selected (no author noted) from How To Be An Up Person In A Down World by Honor Books Inc, 1998, p. 129

Excuses For Not Attending Church

Everybody has a good excuse for not attending church. If you take those excuses and apply them to other things we do (or don't do), like eating, they might look like this list:

1. I was forced to eat as a child.

2. People who eat all the time are hypocrites; they aren't really hungry.

3. There are so many different kinds of food, I can't decide what to eat.

4. I used to eat, but I got bored and stopped.

5. I only eat on special occasions, like Christmas and Easter.

6. None of my friends will eat with me.

7. I'll start eating when I get older.

8. I don't really have time to eat.

9. I don't believe that eating does anybody any good. It's just a crutch.

10. Restaurants and grocery stores are only after your money.

[Author Unknown]

Far Above Rubies

‎"Houses and riches are an inheritance from fathers, But a prudent wife is from the LORD...Who can find a virtuous wife? For her worth is far above rubies." (Proverbs 19:4; 31:10)

Scripture is clear that a man cannot truly 'find' a virtuous or prudent wife on his own. When his paths cross with such a woman and he obtains her, he has 'found' her because God has done it - whether he was aware of God's working or not. She is a gift of God's favor to him, a helper so that he can accomplish all the plans that God has for his own life, and will do him good and not evil all the days of his life (Prov. 31:12).

Married Women:
Make knowing God and being conformed to Christ your highest priority.
You will bring great glory to God directly and through your husband. Your godly virtue continually sends the message that your entrance into your husband's life was no chance meeting, but a gift of God's favor to him.

Single Women:
Make knowing God and being conformed to Christ your highest priority.
Your worth is far above that of precious stones in a culture that promotes superficiality and cheap thrills. As you walk with God you will be a blessing to many. And according to the wisdom of God's will, and the desires of your heart, you will be a prepared helper and companion for a truly godly man, not given lightly by the Lord, at the appointed time.  Facebook
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Apply Biblical Wisdom to Relationships

There is simple biblically inspired wisdom that can help us to nurture the close relationships that God has ordained for our life. As believers in Christ we probably all know that we'll enter our eternal home with full recognition of those we formed relationships with on earth who are also there with us. A few months back it became really, astoundingly, clear to me that our relationships are all that we'll take with us into eternity. Of course, even if we didn't know anyone on earth who is in heaven (I doubt that would be the case) we'll still be loved and welcomed into joyful fellowship, but wouldn't it be extra special if we had a lot of people to welcome us based on recognition, to catch up with, and to continue having fellowship with? We need other Christians here on earth. Christ has made us members of one body and without the other parts we will be dreadfully crippled. Furthermore our adversary the devil walks around as a roaring lion seeking whoever he may devour (1 Peter 5:8), and he is going to be most able to get the weak, the wounded, and the isolated or lone stragglers.

Now, no matter how friendly we are, not every sincere believer we encounter and share interests with is going to become a tight friend that we keep in touch with and share our hearts with. Some of these kinds of God-connections are transparently one-sided where you are either the receiver or giver for God's working and with genuine Christian love - that's perfectly okay. But what I wanted to emphasize is that the Bible has a lot to say on how we are to conduct ourselves and treat one another as members of the Body of Christ and these are equally life-giving commands for personal friendships and relationships. No one should treat a stranger better than they treat the people in their home or in their inner circle. That should be obvious but most of us have been guilty of failing to show family members simple respect. Many later find themselves struggling with household issues that arose out of neglect, hurt, unforgiveness, or an emotional 'disconnect' and lack of empathy for one another.

There is a flip side to using biblical principles in relationships and it has to do with recognizing when and what to leave behind. The world is a very large place and as Christians, God has appointed times, seasons, and places for us. We may interact valuably with many people but we cannot maintain relationships with all of them. There are some others that are harmful and we should not seek to hold on no matter the transient comfort or benefit they seem to promise or provide. The right relationships will be found in the path God has for us, but the wrong ones will lead us to detour from God's will. Relationships literally change the course of our lives for better or for worse.

There are some people who will reject a relationship with us despite our willingness, or who mistreat us. In these cases we should step out of the circle rather than continue going round and round in it. These scenarios may sadly often involve persons within our own biological family. Wisdom from the Scriptures and prayerful trust in God would lead us to avoid investing unhealthily, in a host of unhealthy relationships. This is also a great factor for consideration in assessing potentially romantic relationships.

Recently I had to give some advice to an acquaintance concerning a relationship with a man whom she has invested everything into - though she now sees that he is unwilling to commit wholeheartedly to her in the future. Still, she struggles trying to get him to change. There is wisdom which is found in the Proverbs and woven throughout all the lessons of Scripture which will help her. It is wise to avoid the man who is inattentive, abusive, often angry or mean spirited, or who does not treat you with the common kindness (which he shows to other women or others in general). The man who has a wandering eye and unfaithful heart will not be able to love you as God commanded. The man who does not call you, invest mutually in you, or pursue you, is telling by his actions that his heart is not set towards you. The man whose heart is not set on God is not the person for you. Similarly, I would briefly advise Christian men that the woman who is flirtatious, or loud, or controlling and manipulative, is not the person for you. The woman who is beauty, charm and sweet words - without also having selflessness, godly virtue, discretion, and proven godly character is not the person for you. And to both men and women, the person who can 'talk the Christian talk', but who fails to 'walk the Christian walk', is not the person for you [***see note at end!]. Always believe a person's actions and behavior, far over and above words and appearances. Of course people can be changed if they yield themselves to God, but this is out of our hands. We can only work on ourselves. What we must consider is that what exists in the other person's character right now, is what is real at the same point in time, and that is what we must act on. We are all a work in progress. We can choose to walk in love towards all, but must carefully choose our inner circle of those permitted to know the deeper things of our hearts.

When we must choose who we allow into our life on an intimate basis we do not have to make our assessment blindly because the Scriptures contain what we need.  We need to just take the Word of God at face value and apply its truths to each situation in front of us. In addition, a multitude of godly counselors who stand on the word of God will also add invaluable wisdom to us towards making good decisions. Get counsel from those who esteem God's word and fear Him, who will be confidential, speak the truth and back it up with God's word. Ask God to show or send to you such people. In this way you will be sure to get reliable counsel and insight.

There are relationships in which we grow apart from someone else. Perhaps we got saved and Jesus became our life, but because the other person does not know Him a polite disconnect takes place. In other cases, we may have both once loved sharing the things of God but after some time passes, one relationship has continued to grow with the Lord, and the other person has been backsliding. Now we may still engage some small talk but that person no longer even mentions God, the Bible, or anything that was part of what fostered a connection in the first place. Communication forms the foundation of a relationship. Without sharing core values and interests, communication becomes shallow or infrequent and a separation begins. Prayerfully navigating this time we must ask God for His wisdom and trust Him to lead us in the right way. Sometimes these relationships will be mended and restored by God; sometimes it is best we let them go because these persons are on a different path from the one God has for us. It's worth repeating that relationships literally change the course of our life, and it is in our best interest to trust God with what is unknown of another person's heart. As far as intimate friendships and relationships go, the person who consistently hurts, mistreats, or puts us down us (contrary to the careful and loving behavior such as found in 1 Corinthians 13:1-13), or who draws us away from a relationship with God will be harmful to both our soul and spirit.

It should be easy to recognize how to cherish those God has blessed us with, and alternatively how to flee what is harmful. But we, as people, are complex and fragile. Only the wisdom of God's word when applied to each and every situation - no exceptions - will enable us to navigate safely. I began by making mention of the relationships we may take from this age into eternity. My epiphany about this has inspired me to be more deliberate about how I spend my time and how I engage others at church or wherever I may meet other sincere Believers. I also find a renewed desire to grow in God's love in such a way that no matter which path God leads me into, those I interact with will have experienced a pure, genuine concern and love for themselves from me. I am already grateful for the godly friendships that God has ordained for me in this life. Let me leave you with some inspiring wisdom from author and speaker, Lisa Bevere:

It is imperative, especially in these times, that we allow God to establish our friendships based on His truth and principles. First make God your best friend.

He who loves a pure heart and whose speech is gracious will have the king for his friend.
Proverbs 22:11

Then let the King choose your friends.
We must desire pure hearts over our needs for friendships...God will choose His friends for us, and thus He will want us to treat them the way He would treat them. Then God will entrust us with true friends because He knows we will be true to them.

***Note well: My comments regarding the tell tale signs of relationships which are not the best for a man or woman, do not pertain to those already married but to those who are single or unmarried. The term "not the person for you" is also used loosely, but it should not be mistakenly thought to point to making decisions based on worldly definitions of 'soul mates', or as involving a mystical or unrealistic process of finding 'the one'. It is my view that God alone can best choose a mate for His own children. Many agree that important decisions should not be entered into with God's specific leading and will to be made clear (where to live, career, finances and other life altering ventures). Similarly, but far above all those other reasons, the covenant entered into in marriage is of priority with earthly and eternal spiritual consequences. I do not believe that (with human inability to perfectly know the heart, the future, or even understand all present circumstances) God intends for us to use our limited understanding to choose our own mate without consulting Him and getting specific leading. In fact, I believe that for His own people God is, and should be, the only match maker - even though this specific leading is not to be thought to necessarily depend upon 'signs' or mystical occurrences. The key is to stay submitted to God, seeking His will from the heart, and nurturing relationship with Him so that one knows His leading. This leading will always be in agreement with His word, His ways, His Spirit, and His peace.

Because It's Valentine's Day

Many people celebrate Valentine's Day as a day for showing appreciation and love for family, friends and significant others. Whether or not it's a big occasion on your agenda, no one can argue that true love is a wonderful thing - not often easy, but always wonderful!

In the contemporary culture of mixed messages, where whimsical emotion or lust is often mistaken for love, and where relationships are rife with superficiality, flattery, insincerity, or built on the shaky foundation of individual brokenness and misplaced neediness, it is important for Christians to be intimately acquainted with the true God-kind of love. Several months ago I did a series on Loving with God's Love by taking a look at God's definition of love in 1 Corinthians 13. I hope that you will be inspired to read this chapter of Scripture again, and I invite you to peruse the series by using the links below!

1st - Love is patient
2nd - Love is kind
3rd - Love does not envy
4th - Love does not boast; it is not arrogant or rude
5th - Love does not insist on its own way
6th - Love is not irritable
7th - Love is not resentful
8th - Love does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth
9th - Love bears, believes, hopes, and endures, all things

Happy Valentine's Day!

Love God! 

Love somebody with God's love!

Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God, and whoever loves has been born of God and knows God.

1 John 4:7

Keep Listening

"Cease listening to instruction, my son,
And you will stray from the words of knowledge."

Proverbs 19:27

We live in an information age. There is Scripture and Bible commentary available locally in churches (for most in the Western world), on TV, on the Internet, on Social networking sites such as Facebook and Twitter, in book stores, and of course, in our very own bibles. But it's very easy for knowledge and information accumulation to take the place of the real listening which the Scripture above refers to.

Several years ago when Christ had laid hold of me, I quickly fell in love with His word and fed on it voraciously. Then I entered a new phase whereby I looked forward to my Bible reading times with a pen and notebook in hand - but in a whole new way. It was so subtle I wouldn't have noticed on my own. That is to say, if the Holy Spirit hadn't brought it to my attention, I wouldn't have seen that I had made a shift towards merely enjoying the intellectual pursuit of my Bible studies. I loved seeing patterns, trends, understanding, referencing, note-taking...studying. It is not a bad thing in itself, but I had quickly shifted from being excited about getting to know God from His word, to just enjoying studying - taking very little conscious thought to the ultimate purpose of my studies. By the grace of God, I was able to repent, and make my Bible reading more intentional by asking myself what I had learned about God's ways and character. Coupled with obedience, I believe this is the beginning of sincere listening, and in straying from it we may eventually accumulate knowledge that will not profit us. After all, knowledge resides in the mind, but it does a hardened heart no good.

All Scripture is breathed out by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness, that the man of God may be competent, equipped for every good work.
2 Timothy 3:16-17, ESV

Listening and learning never ends. Now that I know that the Word of God is essential to every facet of my life, and although I have accumulated some knowledge of God's ways and His will, I must not cease from listening. Even now, if I were to choose to starve myself of the Word of God and forgo fellowship with Him, I would find deception, idolatry and other sin increasingly, and easily taking its place. The same would be true of you. That's what the Word of God says. "Cease listening to instruction, my son, and you will stray from the words of knowledge." And many lives have illustrated its truth.

Life-sustaining, overcoming 'listening' must be rooted in an ever-increasing dependent and intimate relationship with God and His Word. Those who are listening prove it by their obedience. We must keep listening!

The law of the LORD is perfect, converting the soul;

The testimony of the LORD is sure, making wise the simple;

The statutes of the LORD are right, rejoicing the heart;

The commandment of the LORD is pure, enlightening the eyes;

The fear of the LORD is clean, enduring forever;

The judgments of the LORD are true and righteous altogether.

More to be desired are they than gold,

Yea, than much fine gold; 

Sweeter also than honey and the honeycomb.

Moreover by them Your servant is warned,

And in keeping them there is great reward.

Psalm 19:7-11

Walk In Step With Your Prayer Requests

God expects us to be very practical. There is no way to be authentic in our faith if we are not also practical. We are to read God's word and do it. God's will for our lives unfolds, and answers to prayer requests (in agreement with God's will) are granted, as we remain on a course of obedience and faith. In the previous post I talked about the danger of praying from a hypocritical heart that will not obey or accept God's leading. In this instance I want to point out something that even sincere believers may need to be reminded about, particularly when asking God for help with various issues in life: Move past merely praying good intentions, to making wise decisions and being obedient. I like to think of this as walking in step with the prayer requests we bring to God. A few illustrations are below.

If you are praying for God's help, deliverance, intervention etc. because:

• you are struggling with unnecessary shopping/overspending - THEN you must resist window/online shopping, shop with a list, ditch your credit cards for a while, purposefully give more to spreading the gospel or helping others
• you need a closer walk with Him - THEN you must also set aside time for earnest prayer and reading and meditating in Scripture (there is NO other way)
• you need to overcome struggles with making an idol out of the desire for a relationship, unhealthy emotional attachments, sinful fantasy/lust etc. - THEN you cannot spend time filling yourself with the content of romance novels, watching romance movies, listening to 'love songs'; you must diligently flee sexually explicit materials, participating in improper interactions or communication with others that will wear down your defenses
• you have prayed in faith and you are waiting on God to act in some issue - THEN wait patiently and do not try to 'help' Him; become preoccupied with God Himself and not your requests by spending more time nurturing your relationship with Him

Those were just a few examples of what I mean by walking in step with your prayer requests. This is not a formula, and success will only come as you receive God's enabling grace. And yes, you will receive grace to submit, grace to resist, grace to flee, grace to wait quietly - but you must be an obedient doer of what you know to do. Commit to cooperating with the Holy Spirit because God will supply you with the grace, for obedience and walking in wisdom, with regard to the matter you are earnestly bringing before Him.

The Way He Looks At Me

I've been to a few weddings now, and an unforgettable one very recently. I think most people will agree that the highlight of the ceremony is the bride's entrance and walk down the aisle to meet the groom. But as in the last weddings I attended, I find myself anticipating almost as much, the groom's expression as his soon-to-be-wife approaches...Actually I miss much of the bride's march down the aisle because I find myself staying tuned to the groom's expression. It thrills my heart...the range of dumbfounded, overwhelmed, even teary-eyed or solemn-in-awe expressions as he sees his bride-to-be headed straight for a lifetime covenant with him, before God.

I have been listening to More Than Ashes sung by by Tim Reimherr of Merchant Band and it makes me think of this captivating scenario, especially when I get to the middle marker (you've got to listen if you don't already know it!)

I have yet to become someone's bride but I'm looking forward to that God-ordained moment, even as I grasp the significance of what that groom's look means to his bride. She puts her all into presenting herself to him, and for him, in that moment. Her reward begins at seeing the approval and pleasure in her groom's eyes. 

Jesus Christ is the Lamb and His blood-bought Saints are His chosen bride. His heart is full for us even now but there is going to be a wedding.  I guarantee you that no earthly wedding, no earthly love, no earthly groom will have ever looked at His bride with more pleasure and awe as He will look at us on that Day. Now that's something worth getting ready for and the Day is fast approaching!

"Let us be glad and rejoice and give Him glory, for the marriage of the Lamb has come, and His wife has made herself ready.”

Revelation 19:7

All An Intercessor Can Do...

An intercessor stands before God to make requests, petitions, and to speak good for another (Jer. 18:20). The intercessor's ministry is a powerful and fruitful one because of the mercy and compassion of the Lord, but the intercessor soon learns that in themselves they are powerless and unable to 'save' another person.

Before I continue with my little thought for today, I cannot help but share some eye-opening Hebrew word study that will make the importance and intensity of intercession stand out to you in a profound way. Please note that the study below includes some key picture images of the ancient Hebrew letters which I am not able to paste here. If you would like to receive the orginal Word doc. file please email me and request it at caribbean[dot]shulamite[at]yahoo[dot]com.

By: Kathy Nichols
Ancient Hebrew Research Center
Biblical Hebrew E-Magazine
December, 2005, Issue #022

The second word usually translated intercession is the child root “paga”. You will recognise the (peh) which is the picture of a mouth from last months article. The first new picture form in this word is the picture of a foot which means to walk, gather, carry etc. It has the “g” sound. Paga means a chance meeting or encounter, or to place as a meeting. This could be an impingement, which figuratively means to attack with persistent requests. It can be persistently, even to the point of annoyance! When we read this, we are immediately drawn to the parables and sayings of Jesus concerning asking, seeking and knocking. No doubt God loves us to impinge on His wonderful grace to enable those we pray for to fulfill the role they were intended for. An unripe fig becoming ripe! In actual fact the parent root of “paga” the word pag means “Unable to fulfill the role intended for. An unripe fig!” The third picture added to this parent root is the picture of an eye which means experience, to see, to know and understand. In prayer we desire to ask for those who are living unfulfilled lives without the Lord, or lives with affliction and inability, because we have experienced and know what God can do for them. Having received this experience from such a benevolent and kind creator should challenge us to walk as close to Him as we can. This will enable God to touch our hearts in prayer to experience at times how other people feel and also how He Himself feels. This is an immense honour.

Is 53:12 “ while actually bearing the sin of many and interceding for the offenders.”

Is 59:15b,16a “..Adonai saw it, and it displeased Him that there was no justice; He saw there was no one, and was amazed that that no one interceded. Therefore His own arm brought him salvation…”

Here the words for intercession are “paga”.

So what Isaiah is pointing out is that God desired to bring about justice, but there was no intercessor – no-one willing to impinge on Him and because of the terrible state of the land, and no-one praying, God was appalled and disappointed.

A fascinating use of “paga” is found in Isaiah 53:6 ..the Lord laid (paga) on him the iniquity of us all.” The word is meaning our sins “fell” on Jesus, (so we could become what He intended). If one reads through all the verses using “paga” a good number of them are about “falling on” someone and the person dying, so there is great intensity in this word.

Intercession is a critical task and God seeks for intercessors that He may show His mercy and compassion to those who are headed for destruction or being spiritually attacked. Many more lives than we know have been changed and impacted by the personal intercession of family and friends, church prayer groups and the like. Many times the intercessor may not see the changes prayed for take place but they receive the answer by faith and lay the burden of a matter down.

When praying for the souls of people we are praying for hearts and wills that may resist but this is a difficult area to understand. God has given man free will to make choices between life and death; and He can also turn the hearts of men. Most certainly He is able to orchestrate circumstances to deal with the hindering blindness or pride of a person that may be resisting His mercy.

Needless to say, intercessors soon learn that to pray is all they can really do for they are not able to bring the change they are hopeful about. Some people we pray for are deluded and deceived by their sins, believing they are in right standing with God or that He will overlook their disobedience under their 'special' circumstances. They hear God's call to repentance and believe it is for someone else (see Jer. 2:35).

Other people will not turn to God and do not want to change even when they hear God's call to repentance and His promise of forgiveness. These are usually hardened hearts who have often been rebuked and invited to turn to God. No one can know of the instance in which God will give them over to the sins that they love. Having forfeited and scoffed at the patient mercy of the Lord, these will eventually come to the place where God may say as He did to Jeremiah concerning the people of Israel and Judah, "Do not pray for them because I will not hear"[See Jeremiah 5:1-3;18:11-12; 7:16].

All an intercessor can do in those difficult cases is to:
~ obey the heart cry of the Spirit of God that compels them to pray for another
"And I sought a man among them, that should make up the hedge, and stand in the gap before me for the land, that I should not destroy it: but I found none. Therefore have I poured out mine indignation upon them; I have consumed them with the fire of my wrath: their own way have I recompensed upon their heads, saith the Lord." Ezekiel 22:30-31

~ weep for the unrepentant
"If you do not listen, I will weep in secret because of your pride; my eyes will weep bitterly, overflowing with tears, because the LORD’s flock will be taken captive." Jeremiah 13:17

~ move on in God's plan
"And Samuel went no more to see Saul until the day of his death. Nevertheless Samuel mourned for Saul, and the LORD regretted that He had made Saul king over Israel. Now the LORD said to Samuel, “How long will you mourn for Saul, seeing I have rejected him from reigning over Israel? Fill your horn with oil, and go; I am sending you to Jesse the Bethlehemite. For I have provided Myself a king among his sons.” 1 Samuel 15:35,16:1

Only God Can Change Man

Can the Ethiopian change his skin or the leopard its spots?

Then may you also do good who are accustomed to do evil.

Jeremiah 13:23

Perhaps parents learn before anyone else just how impossible it is to change their children and to rid them of their rebelliousness or disobedience. Maybe wives struggling with difficult marriages because of their husband's disconnectedness or addictions know best that they cannot be good enough in their own roles to change the men they married. Or just maybe if we've gotten honest insight enough to look at ourselves, we've faced the hidden things of our heart - desires and attitudes that should have no place in ourselves - and know that we cannot make permanent change only some successful periods of white-knuckling.

You meet him who rejoices and does righteousness,

Who remembers You in Your ways.

You are indeed angry, for we have sinned—

In these ways we continue;

And we need to be saved.

Isaiah 64:5

Maybe as you read this you are thinking of sin issues that need to be annihilated, maybe you are just facing some things you'd like to change or improve. The key is settling it with yourself that you cannot change any heart (your own or someone else's) and therefore setting your face steadfastly towards the LORD. If you really believe that you have no power to change the heart of man, then you must cry out, give God no rest and wait until He acts on your behalf. What this will look like in your individual case will differ. Maybe, as I needed to do for a period of time in my earlier walk, you will need to spend extended periods of time reading the word of God, praying desperate prayers and fasting like there was no tomorrow. Or maybe you will need to spend some time in deep intercession for someone else, making supplication based on the will of God and letting that person go to Him. God can change the heart and He delights to do it to the praise of His glorious grace (Isa. 61:3; Eph. 1:6). Call upon Him, pour yourself out before Him, and put all your trust in Him.

But now, O LORD,

You are our Father;

We are the clay, and You our potter;

And all we are the work of Your hand.

Isaiah 64:8