Faithful are the wounds of a friend; profuse are the kisses of an enemy.
Proverbs 27:6
I have a few good friends. Well, three to be exact. I have many more acquaintances than that. I appreciate most of my acquaintances, some I seem to just be stuck with (Ooops). Altogether, I just recognize that these relationships don't run very deep, even for those who may be wonderful true friends to others. And in fact, some of them are shallow enough for me to be pretty certain there is a lot of syrupy sweet, fair weather niceties involved. Sometimes, I even know I'm being flattered (bad, bad, bad - just look it up in any Bible concordance).
Are you sure that the people you consider to be your friends are more than just 'fun to be with'? You can have fun with a bunch of uninhibited tipsy people too. I'm just saying...And anyone can smile sweetly, or switch out their tone of voice and say, "Oh, I'm so sorry, I'm praying for you." Are they indeed praying for you? Is it dutiful mention if it happens, or intercession? Are they going to press through for your good?
Are your friends going to do what hurts you, for your own good? I found out about a woman who cheated on her husband with another guy at church. Her friend suspected, confronted and gave her time to break it off. She didn't break it off. Her friend then told the Pastors, who then took the matter over. She was mad that her friend told, caused all of this to come crashing down on her. Today, she knows that the woman who stepped in was a true friend (and her life has totally been restored, repaired and taken up a couple notches!).
How many times are we simply content to be the one that a friend in trouble calls...and all we do is listen and rehash the situation and make exclamations...until the next phone call. Are you a good friend to others? Are you willing to faithfully wound a friend? Are you willing to lose your invitation to their inner circle for a while, or maybe always?
I'm just going to conclude this brief 'heads up' here by repeating the last part of the Scripture verse I started with: "Profuse are the kisses of an enemy"
Who's kissing you profusely and not meeting the biblical standard of friendship in other areas? Think on it!
Very nice post. Good points and eloqently written.
ReplyDeleteas an example...
For my friends whose weddings I have been a part of (and others too) I tell them that I make a vow to them as well. If at any point in their marriage, if I know of anything threatening their marriage - or see them considering something that might damage their marriage.... I promise to tell them.
I will tell the person in the wrong first... then tell the other.
Recently, a friend of mine came across her old love letters from past boyfriends. She and her husband had decided together that they could keep those artifacts - just for their historic value.
As she read the letters from her college boyfriend, she realized that he really did have her best interest in mind - all those years ago - but she didn't recognize it then.
So she wanted to contact him and tell him that she recognized it now. What did I think? She said her hubby gave his consent to do so.
I warned her to not even open that can of worms. I told her that I knew her intentions were pure - but that you never know what my happen later because of it. Very strongly, I said... don't do it. Any good that might come of it is not worth the risk. And I reminded her that I was being stern to guard her marriage.
As far as I know... she didn't do it.
It's the little things people.
Tammy, that's a true mark of friendship indeed. And wisdom. I'm grateful to God on behalf of your friend just on reading about this incident!
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